Showing revision #114d229a of page leftoids

How to be a Leftoid: 10 red flags to drape yourself with

  1. Be obsessed with identity: declare all your affiliations when describing completely unrelated matters. "As a disabled queer POC in STEM, I really hate cottage cheese".

  2. Needlessly collectivize people at every opportunity in order to attack and demonize them: "You oppose industrial civilization which naturally means you want to genocide (deified identity groups that celebrate industrial civilization), we must purge you for the good of all society!"

  3. REFUSE to veer off strict path set out for you by dead idols, always live in that cozy 19th century factory in your mind and scream bloody murder at anyone who dares poke holes in the illusion: "REVISIONIST ANTI-COMMUNIST SCUM!!!"

  4. Use carefully constructed academic language in order to maintain elitist barriers that will keep the unwashed peasants out of "the community" (politburo)

  5. If that doesn't work, make heavy use of fun words like "problematic", "reactionary", "wrecker", "doomer" to castigate the filthy animals who won't fall in line with your glorious revolutionary program and cast them out before they taint the beautiful utopia you're sacrificing EVERYTHING to build

  6. Speaking of sacrifice, make sure to ritually sacrifice your fellow leftoids whenever the opportunity presents itself because remember: there can only be one Chairman of the Council of People's Commissars and all pretenders need to be brutally eliminated so you can secure that chair

  7. Strap on those boots, march, chant those slogans, wear those badges and wave that flag because the only way to destroy nationalists is to goosestep right behind them (but draped in red)

  8. ACAB (except us)

  9. Remember: Victimhood is the most powerful identity of all. Tell everyone within earshot how victimized you are and how much you deserve to be in charge

  10. Work! The productivity of the worker is paramount. We can't build the revolution without a strong work ethic, comrade, even if that means we need to sacrifice half the workers and 98% of the world's ecosystems in the process... Just keep telling yourself you're enduring an empty, torturous life so your great-great-great grandchildren can one day live in a classless, money-less utopia after the revolution. Working yourself to death is always worthwhile when communism is the end goal.


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1. Be obsessed with identity: declare all your affiliations when describing completely unrelated matters. "As a disabled queer POC in STEM, I really hate cottage cheese".

2. Needlessly collectivize people at every opportunity in order to attack and demonize them: "You oppose industrial civilization which naturally means you want to genocide (deified identity groups that celebrate industrial civilization), we must purge you for the good of all society!"

3. REFUSE to veer off strict path set out for you by dead idols, always live in that cozy 19th century factory in your mind and scream bloody murder at anyone who dares poke holes in the illusion: "REVISIONIST ANTI-COMMUNIST SCUM!!!"

4. Use carefully constructed academic language in order to maintain elitist barriers that will keep the unwashed peasants out of "the community" (politburo)

5. If that doesn't work, make heavy use of fun words like "problematic", "reactionary", "wrecker", "doomer" to castigate the filthy animals who won't fall in line with your glorious revolutionary program and cast them out before they taint the beautiful utopia you're sacrificing EVERYTHING to build

6. Speaking of sacrifice, make sure to ritually sacrifice your fellow leftoids whenever the opportunity presents itself because remember: there can only be one Chairman of the Council of People's Commissars and all pretenders need to be brutally eliminated so you can secure that chair

7. Strap on those boots, march, chant those slogans, wear those badges and wave that flag because the only way to destroy nationalists is to goosestep right behind them (but draped in red)

8. ACAB (except us)

9. Remember: Victimhood is the most powerful identity of all. Tell everyone within earshot how victimized you are and how much you deserve to be in charge

10. Work! The productivity of the worker is paramount. We can't build the revolution without a strong work ethic, comrade, even if that means we need to sacrifice half the workers and 98% of the world's ecosystems in the process... Just keep telling yourself you're enduring an empty, torturous life so your great-great-great grandchildren can one day live in a classless, money-less utopia after the revolution. Working yourself to death is always worthwhile when communism is the end goal.