ghost

ghost wrote

My father never ate anything my mom cooked. Apparently he never ate anything his mom cooked either. Once he got old enough, he would just go cook himself dinner. Usually it was a hot dog or hamburger, but with my mom it’s fish (which she hates and typically won’t cook) or a sandwich. Idk… it worked for them, I guess.

I do most of the cooking but I have most of the allergies, so when I cook something I would consider bland for normal people, I suggest condiments for my spouse. Like I can’t eat tomato or onion so our tacos are pretty bland (I do have one safe seasoning packet that’s awesome though), so he always puts salsa on his, and we keep salsa and taco sauce in the fridge so he can spice his up separately. We’ve done this with some other condiments and foods, too.

If you’ve got an electric slow cooker, could you premake soup or chili so that it cooks while you’re working, and your spouse doesn’t have to do it? Or you could tag team it, where you put something in the crock pot and then tell her it would be good with some other thing (salad, and put all the veggies that need cutting in the same spot in the fridge so it’s easy to find, or biscuits and use bisquick because that’s hard to fuck up if she likes baking, etc)… maybe if it’s more of a team effort she’d be into it?

Could she maybe not know how to cook, and maybe grew up with overly critical family? Like if you showed her an easy recipe and made sure the ingredients were in the house (and phrase it like “I’d really like to try this on my day off but it looks easy and if you want to give it a go tonight, feel free”?), do you think she’d try it out?

I always used to take legit gentle criticism super personally because I come from emotionally immature parents who traumatized the fuck out of me. Now it’s easier. But fwiw, if you’re eating at least some of the bland stuff she cooks, that’s love and I’m sure she notices.

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ghost wrote

I’m unwell and tired so here’s an excerpt from a thing:

"CAN YOU tell us briefly," your friend asks, "what Anarchism really is?"

I shall try. In the fewest words, Anarchism teaches that we can live in a society where there is no compulsion of any kind.

A life without compulsion naturally means liberty; it means freedom from being forced or coerced, a chance to lead the life that suits you best.

You cannot lead such a life unless you do away with the institutions that curtail your liberty and interfere with your life, the conditions that compel you to act differently from the way you really would like to.

What are those institutions and conditions? Let us see what we have to do away with in order to secure a free and harmonious life. Once we know what has to be abolished and what must take its place, we shall also find the way to do it.

What must be abolished, then, to secure liberty?

First of all, of course, the thing that invades you most, that handicaps or prevents your free activity; the thing that interferes with your liberty and compels you to live differently from what would be your own choice.

That thing is government.

Take a good look at it and you will see that government is the greatest invader; more than that, the worst criminal man has ever known of. It fills the world with violence, with fraud and deceit, with oppression and misery. As a great thinker once said, "its breath is poison." It corrupts everything it touches.

Source: https://libcom.org/library/what-is-anarchism-alexander-berkman-20

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ghost wrote

I worked a campground in very NorCal a couple summers ago and a bunch of the people visiting were prospectors. They’d go out on their (or their friends) mining claims and look for gold (or whatever— I know some claims are like emeralds and silver and whatever other bits of precious)… most folks seemed to make a few hundred bucks in gold in each trip, but that barely covers the cost of the trip IMO. But most folks seemed to be doing it for fun and only a couple were wackadoodle enough to think they’d someday hit it big and become millionaires.

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ghost wrote

Idk… because of a long history of ED and now super severe celiac and food allergies, going without food is nbd (while simultaneously being very triggering). Asceticism I guess is also sort of a non-con thing since disability (and now covid) prevents me from partaking in many enjoyable things.

If your concern is that you’ll be “weak” if the cops try to disappear you, I think practicing what you’re supposed to do if they pick you up (never talk to cops, memorize an attorney’s number, practice saying “I do not consent to a search if my person, my car, my bag, or my home,” etc), as well as reading up on the experiences of other anarchists in custody, might be a better use of energy. At least it is for me. Ymmv, obviously.

As far as anarchism is concerned… I’m an anarchist because I want everyone to be happy and safe and comfortable. I get so little pleasure in this life, I really don’t want to go without if I have a choice.

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ghost wrote

Thanks. I also never go anywhere. I do have a partner who works outside the home but he masks and has been very careful. I caught it from a landlord interaction I couldn’t avoid (normally I don’t have to interact but there was a tree about to fall on our rv where we’re staying and they were ignoring our calls and texts). I had a kn95 mask the whole time and the whole interaction was 10min. But they’re unvaxxed and we’re unmasked, and that’s all it took for a highly transmissible strain.

That’s partly why I’m so angry. Landlords are trash.

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ghost wrote

I’m unbearably angry about the world. Still have covid. I thought I was getting better but things got worse a couple nights ago and I feel like ass. The US response to covid is pure fucking eugenics. I’m angry that I have to spend so much energy fighting to survive this hell, so that I don’t have the energy to do things that matter and make a difference.

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ghost wrote

I’ve always wondered how they work. It makes me super angry that this system even exists… seems more like a license to strip-mine the planet.

But if you can put out a bucket and shovel as your operation, and some fake signs to keep people away (and/or maybe some code to encourage other friendly folk to pull up a patch of dirt), and live in a camper, it might be a valid way to preserve some land and let it flourish.

Hmm.

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ghost wrote

I kind of get this a lot… for me, it’s from not eating enough filling stuff. I have celiac and can’t eat many things with grains because most grains in the US are too contaminated with gluten for me. So I can eat an enormous salad or huge plate of veggies, and I’ll be physically full but the food I ate doesn’t give me enough energy to feel like I ate enough.

But I also have gut problems and the line between “I think I’m still hungry” and “I am painfully uncomfortably full” is only about two extra bites of food.

I spend way too much time trying to decide if I’m legit hungry or if I should just wait it out. I fucking hate it.

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ghost wrote

I think it’s a super ableist question and I hate it. If I’m not working, sleeping, or eating, I’m probably doing absolutely nothing because I don’t have the energy to do anything not directly related to my survival.

It’s as bad as “how are you?”

Also small talk is asinine.

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ghost wrote

Nice!! I use some kinda starch to thicken because celiac but honestly it all tastes the same. Also canned coconut milk is nice because the coconut fat is a good dairy fat sub IMO. I went to a restaurant that used an entire mashed potato as the thickener and it was so good.

Plus you get all those good b vitamins from the nooch… I just love it.

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ghost OP wrote

Yeah I relate… and I’m sorry this fuckery has worsened your health.

I’ve been disabled and chronically ill my whole life. The pandemic itself (or rather American society’s response to it) definitely made my ptsd way worse, and I just caught it a week and change ago and now it’s made my physical disability worse too.

At this point, I’m actually glad that it’s probably shortened my life because idk how much more of this I can take.

I’ll go down fighting, but I can’t imagine waiting until old age to do it.

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ghost OP wrote

Totally agree.

I personally don’t have a definition for “the left” and I think the article’s author might be defining it as the line between libs and demsoc’s.

But I’m also not really here for my fellow anarchists who think their actions (not masking in public) don’t kill and disable people. That don’t mean I support ANY kind of mandate, but I definitely see this ableism for what it is.

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