cyberrose

cyberrose wrote

Why not calling it what it is? Sure over use of terms does not bring benefits but these people will definitely fit in one or another fascism definition. It's not about "evil" or "bad guys". And knowing what it is also shows what danger lies in it and gives you tools to act.

Your strategy seems to be aimed in not letting such movement rise. And thats really important. But after fascism appears and shows publicly there has also to be direct action against it before it's too late. This means you + the people around you won't be enough. Which does not mean you need a mass movement. There are other organizational tactics more fitting for this kind of work. So what I'm trying to say: Maybe my logic is a bit backwards (but I don't think so since the points you mentioned are also fundamental) or I just see different layers of escalation calling for different responses.

I just wanted to point out that organization, not for mass movement but for establishing vivid resilient connections, is needed for being able to defend you and your surrounding if shit hits the fan... I mean not being prepared broke revolutionaries (anarchists and communists) not just once the neck.

Also will look into the books you mentioned... And sorry if I'm hard to read; it's not my mother tongue.

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cyberrose wrote

what i'll say is this isn't how I understand being communist. Communism is one thing, but being a communist means participating in communization.

Yes but thats also a very specific and in general not the most popular view on communism. And self defining communist groups (at least here) are not really working on changing this since the 80s or so. I just think the writing person did not have this in mind?

I like your points.

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cyberrose wrote (edited )

I think I, as anti authoritarian communist, am starting to learn what this individualism is about. Also I think my viewpoints are not completely different than whats described in the text. I have the liberating nihilism in common. I share the knowledge that a utopia in the future can not (really) be imagined. I also share the point to start from the now and here. The only thing I could not come over (and currently still don't want to) is the aim to create something new from the ashes of the old. I can not relate to the joy of pure destruction, I don't have to have a concrete future in mind to work for a future I can relate to.

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cyberrose wrote

Always remember: You are not responsible for what another people does to his/herself. Breaking up is no abuse and if you feel it's the right thing he has to deal with it.

I also have a bad feeling if you let yourself feel responsible for another persons well being. In the end it will just hurt your own.

Just be clear, just be fair, just tell the truth. That's everything you could and should do.

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cyberrose wrote

Reply to comment by catachresis in Getting ghosted sucks by catachresis

Okay, this also makes sense. Did you try writing the person after that?

Have you considered just trying to continue writing and not meeting in person? Not sure if the other side would write you then but maybe this would help?

Just a last thing: The biggest group in such dating platforms does not search for a partner/love. They just search for (online) companionship to not feel lonely.

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cyberrose wrote (edited )

Delete your account, delete the App and don't come back until you feel well again. If you still have this thing and use it you will get triggered for quite some time.

One more thing: People are often also shy. Sometimes they just don't know how to react. They often do not intend to hurt others. Online dating alienates humans from human relationship.

In general: You have to accept that neither the platform nor (most of) the people see a human being in you when using the App. For the company you are the product and customer in one person; they design the App not to make you happy or satisfy your needs (for human relations), they don't want to lose you as customer and product. Many other people in such App see you also as product, because of this problem. Men have this tendency since they often pay for the usage and the want something in return for their money. Women since they can be picky (there are much more men on such platforms) and often have negative contact with people there.

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cyberrose OP wrote

Yah you are kinda right but talking too less/awkward silence was just a half of the problem. We are a quite heterogeneous group when it comes to gender, class heritage, ... The quite people are often female*, the people talking rather too much male*. Another problem with Hooks was that it was about class and here style of writing. People with different class heritages became upset on some points, and other people started to complain about her subjective writing style. So yes we had quite some discussions but they often did not feel good/beneficial.

So now we decided to skip this book (as group) and continue with another one. But I think we also need to change our way of working.

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cyberrose wrote

Living in a bigger city now, I (somehow) miss the village. Sure everything was limited and you need to get along with the people since you don't have other options but it also provided you with stuff you won't find in a city. The slow pace of the world, the endless inspiration for wasting time with stupid stuff, the freedom of doing what you want with minimal consequences...

But also: Without some of the people I met elsewhere I don't want to go back in such a setting. It just felt like "liberating" because you simply did not know the other options. Also it was much easier to reproduce oppressive behavior in various forms; but you won't notice that if you don't get in contact with others...

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cyberrose wrote (edited )

Lol so you feel too oppressed here that you start crying in other forums/communities and block people disagreeing with you? Pathetic.

So you think being banned for not being allowed to spread hate towards people you classify as feminine/not masculine enough makes the people here to fascists? Interesting.

Your ego is beyond anything. Should I be sorry that it hurt your feelings that people disagreed with your bullshit? No. Go fuck yourself.

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