Xylanthius

3

Xylanthius wrote

You think applesauce is too sweet? and you would like a mild sauce?

Do you get the kind that is made of just apples and that is too sweet, too?

or are you saying that you make it a different way that makes apples less sweet?

One time I made applesauce in my vitamix with a bunch of apples from the tree I needed to do something with. Imagine if you had a farm. It would be so easy to live off of latkas and applesauce. Maybe that's how that combination came about in the first place? What do you think?

3

Xylanthius wrote

Find out if there is an animal center nearby that specializes in those kinds of animals. If you are in America there are tons of animal sanctuaries. You can probably find one online also and it might be able to travel to someone who can or would like to fulfill the creature's needs.

What kind of animal is it? It's possible that we could help.

8

Xylanthius wrote (edited )

Thruought my life I have learned that having needs is "bad" and that being "needy" is a "bad" and "annoying" thing. Because of that, I have learned to deny my own needs. When I deny my needs I experience an overwhelming amount of uncomfortable feelings which drugs and addictive behavior seem to be the only successful freeing agent.

I'm learning now that needs are a gift, and feelings are a guide to learn about what my needs are.

I'm learning the magic of nonviolent communication. I've only been studying it for a little while, but it's already helped relieve me from a lot of the usual suffering. It's really amazing and empowering stuff.

A lot of our experience of reality stems from our interpretation of it. Our experience is also comprised of the people we bring into our world which validate our own perceptions of our reality. If we think that our needs are not important then we bring people into our lives that validate that reality that they are not important.

Most of us don't know what our actual needs are. It's not like the adults ever taught us.

Empathy is a skill that you have to practice in order to get good at it.

The only way to find peace in this reality is through love and empathy.

Violence and violent communication can never solve our problems especially because our side does not have a monopoly on it. It simply leads to more harm, hurt, and violence.

Reply to comment by /u/EatTheRich in Friday Free Talk by /u/selver

4

Xylanthius wrote

She has a need that is not being fulfilled in these moments, and whatever said the stimulus is making her feel uncomfortable feelings that resonate whatever needs that are not being met.

We have nine basic needs, and all of the needs fall into these categories:

love, empathy, rest/recreation, community, creativity, autonomy, and purpose.

one or more of these basic needs are being threatened.

when we feel like our needs are not being met we often respond in ways that other people can interpret as disrespectful.

The adults don't really know any better. They don't know how to be empathetic. we live in a society that is structured in a way where accounting seems like a more meaningful skill than empathy.

empathy is a skill you practice though. it's worth practicing.

especially when you consider that robots can do accounting now. they can't really do empathy.

feelings and needs are superpowers. when we start connecting on the levels of our feelings and needs solutions find us.

1

Xylanthius wrote

Only if you are hostile will I feel my intelligence insulted.

That explanation did help.

I’m not knowledgeable to a lot of the stuff that is talked about on here I just live with the feelings of wrongness.

So as long as you are not hostile I’m not going to feel insulted. I know this feels wrong but I don’t understand why.

Egos are kind of toxic. Everything is in transit.