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Wanted: token cis, straight, male friend

Submitted by emma in transgendercirclejerk

After nine years, one of my few remaining cis, straight, male friends turned out to be not so straight after all. To add insult to injury, he's even become fashion-conscious. I predict my only other friend in this category won't hold out very long either, so I am seeking new friends to be my tokens!

Desirable attributes:

  • Wardrobe that makes it look like you picked everything out with your eyes closed.

  • Be someone I've misplaced my trust in when I vent to you about the ills of being trans in a cis society.

  • Uses 2-in-1 shampoo/body wash, no conditioner, no other hair care products.

  • Won't explore any interests, feelings, or desires if they're even slightly outside of society's rigid gender norms for at least 5 years.

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