I haven't had a good night sleep since my country elected a complete asshole as president last October. I've been having nightmares and anxiety dreams LITERALLY every single day since it happened. Things were bad before, but honestly now I feel is almost beyond repair. I see so many people leaving my country for lack of hope of anything good and I can't blame them, I used to hate so much people who talked shit on our country, I tried to say that we were young, we have been fucked in the ass by our colonizers and more powerful countries, we are learning. Honestly right now I only feel like we are a shit hole beyond repair, our elite is so ridiculously stupid even by elite standards, our left is egotistical and fucking dumb as fuck, our people are fucking assholes that are so numb they vote powered by hate alone. It's so fucking frustrating, every time in our history that things seems to be going on a better path we are fucked or fuck ourselves. It is so ridiculous, so many people are dying and so many more are gonna die just because people don't give a fuck, people who are being killed don't give a fuck anymore, they are just hoping death comes to the "bad people" as well. I'm just so angry and sad and powerless and fuck I just wanted one good night sleep. I feel like a stupid teenager right now, feeling like nothing matters, like everything is just pointless. But I know it's not true, I try to get comfort in the fact that if I'm so angry more people feel the same, that maybe we will be able to stop this madness.
I don't know, just really tired and wanted to cry a bit since I can't sleep tonight.