I am becoming always more nihilist, but I don't want to be depressed, I want to be active.
I want to live NOW and stop waiting for "Tha Future", but on the other hand, I don't want to accept the present moment, I want to escape and thrive for a commune or something like that. I somehow cannot make actions I feel blocked.
I feel like living in the present moment also means being inactive and accepting this society. But I don't think I want that :(
I want to build my world, I want to make my life better. I want to help people around me and I want to become always more free, but I have no fucking clue on how to do it.