Submitted by ziq in meta

JustHereToApologize wrote to ziq about 9 hours ago

I'm assuming you banned me and yes I did just create an alt but I just wanted to say sorry. I'm not sure if I should risk traumatizing her more by shoving my virtual self into her space but I would like to apologize to her too. I guess your call whether to pass this along or not. It wasn't my intention to imply any of those things. And besides coming off as a TERF I said other stupid ignorant things just in general. I'm sorry for my insensitive and thoughtless words and any trauma they caused. I'll stay away from the forums and try to educate myself more on how to be a better comrade to trans people. Also I guess sorry to you if any of this was traumatizing for you. I don't know if you are a trans person or not and I didn't think of it until just now but yeah. Just sorry all around.

The admin that banned them was u/Fossidarity

The comment they were banned for:

https://raddle.me/f/Anarchism/59379/comment/93249

Next time a ban like this happens of a regular user, admins please post a transparency thread here.

7

Comments

You must log in or register to comment.

An_Old_Big_Tree wrote

Next time a ban like this happens of a regular user, admins please post a transparency thread here.

Or just make a comment on the relevant comments explaining the ban.

Assuming that this apology turns out to be sincere, I'm ok with unbanning, or changing the permanent global ban to a temporary forum ban.
I tend to like to give a user a bit more time to come right before I ban them if they've been around a little while. But I recognise that this can come at the expense of other people who have to read their stuff, so I don't have a problem with what Foss did.

5

Fossidarity admin wrote (edited )

I banned them, it's one of the cases where I asked if I should ban someone because I wasn't sure about it, the opinion was shitty but I saw someone who was willing to engage in discussion and learn. When I asked if I should ban them in the meta chat I got a snide remark which felt to me like "how can you even consider letting someone like this post comments", this also felt to me like I made a wrong judgement (which I feel a lot lately). I felt I was put back in my place and banned them immediately as a result.

I don't feel like unbanning that user even though the PM (why to /u/ziq?) felt heartfelt. I do want to protect this space from TERFs even though I'm not the right person to do that.

Nobody could do anything about it if the banned user were to make a new account to start over.

I feel like I made too many mistakes with banning people who are not obvious spam, so I won't ban anyone anymore like this except when a new post is made and consensus is reached.

4

ziq OP wrote

My concern is that there was no transparency posted. The mod log doesn't show admin bans because of technical limitations, so they need to be announced or people will wonder why the user just stopped replying to them.

5

Fossidarity wrote

You are right about that, that's why I'll just create a new submission for it next time.

3

ziq OP wrote

It was a clear ToS violation (transphobia) so I don't think you have any reason to regret making the ban. The only thing I would have done differently is wait for them to respond to being called out first. I noticed they immediately downvoted clouds' calls outs so they probably would have responded by digging their heels in.

3

conseil wrote

My opinion probably doesn't weigh in (I don't think I meet requirements) but I think that, given it seemed heartfelt and looks like they want to learn, they shouldn't be globally banned- maybe banned from queer forums, though.

If they want to learn, there's only one good way- and getting told how much a dickwad you are works well.

2

ziq OP wrote (edited )

I think it should really be up to trans women specifically to decide how to handle trans women excluders, rather than having everyone on the site weigh in.

3

conseil wrote (edited )

Then I suppose I would qualify? I was thinking of account requirements in the sidebar.

2

[deleted] wrote

2

Fossidarity wrote

I didn't tell you at all that it's okay that TERFs can hurt trans women, I was just not sure about how offending the remark was and it looked like their opinion could be swayed so I didn't want to ban them immediately.

I'm sorry that I came across as taking the TERFs side or even allowing their opinion but that's not what it was.

I don't see how that comment was warranted because I'm just trying to help. I know I'm not the best admin ever but I'm also doing my best..

2

[deleted] wrote (edited )

3

ziq OP wrote

Also they said:

They are like 2 decades ahead of their male colleagues ideology wise

Which implies that hating trans women (and sex workers in most cases) is somehow woke.

1

[deleted] wrote (edited )

1

ziq OP wrote

I'm not really sure, that's why I was disappointed they were banned before they could explain themselves.

1

[deleted] wrote (edited )

1

Fossidarity wrote

I don't want to reduce your concern to that, I value your concern otherwise I wouldn't have reacted at all. The 'snide remark' part is how I interpreted your reaction to my question, and how it made me feel, not your concern itself:

When I asked if I should ban them in the meta chat I got a snide remark which felt to me like "how can you even consider letting someone like this post comments", this also felt to me like I made a wrong judgement (which I feel a lot lately).

2

[deleted] wrote

1

Fossidarity wrote (edited )

I do want to cover for myself because I want to clarify my actions and my feelings. I don't see how that diminishes your concerns though. I know you never told me to ban anyone I'm just trying to explain myself.

2

[deleted] wrote

1

Fossidarity wrote (edited )

What other term should I use instead?

Fossidarity
A very shitty opinion but should they be banned for it?

amongstclouds
Yeah let's put TERFS in power
>.>

2