I'm thinking of never talk again, it's a waste of time and I'm sick of it, maybe I will pretend that I have lost my voice, maybe I'll make an exception on raddle

might have found a future lover.. im scared!
edit: never mind c': aslkdjfsakdfj;slkdfj

Hello

I took Monday off, I didnt tell anyone, going to pretend to go to work. Going to do lots of thinking/brooding. Should be a horrible time.

the situationship is over. I'm weirdly at peace with it for the moment. maybe I'll be an absolute wreck later? heartbreak is weird.

Have someone visiting us this week, who maybe wants to live here. I find them very cool, even if its yet another German person coming here.

Been offered a job and accepted it and have 2 weeks more before I work full time again. At least I managed to get a raise over my last job even taking into account inflation. My CV is like that my longest job was for a year and a half and all my other jobs were 3-4 months. spent about an hour on monday trying to convince the recruiter that I wouldn't leave as soon as I had the money too lol. Its a shame that I have to start work just as the good part of the year is starting.

Maybe its good for me participating here though. Already have been here less just because I've been doing outdoors stuff all last week. if I'm working every day I'm probably gonna be on raddle more often.

was talking to my dad about veganism this week and he said that i've rly conditioned myself lol

Work related musings and complaining. Gonna be some mentions of bodily excretions in this one so don't read while you are eating or if you're squeamish.

Now that I've done hotel housekeeping for 4 months, as well as based on my previous experience with janitorial and custodial work, there are now a lot of things I encounter in my job that ordinary people would find disgusting which no longer faze me. When I find used condoms in the trash I would be mentally thanking the departed guests for the heads-up before putting on gloves to change the sheets, until I considered that used condoms probably indicate that there shouldn't even be that much cumstains in the sheets compared to potentially any other room where a couple have obviously been living in. Similarily, used pads and tampons in the trash are no problem for me anymore, just a little bit of smell until I chuck the trash bag into the bigger trash bag. When I open a toilet lid and discover that it is covered in shit or puke stains all over the bowl and seat, my first thought isn't "eeeewww!" but rather "damn, this one is gonna take a few extra minutes to clean". Dried shit stains don't smell. And even if the departed guest left a fat number 2 in the bowl without flushing, that's no big deal, just flush it once or twice.

There is one thing I have not become desentisized to, though. My least favorite part of this job is when I have to clean a room that has been used by a family with kids. Not only is there double the amount of linen to deal with, there is usually also plenty of trash, dirty cups and dishes, empty cans, etc as families tend to stay for more than just 1 night and pay for the privilege of not having to clean up after themselves. But that isn't the worst part, it's the fucking parents with babies. I absolutely despise diapers. The used diapers always end up in one or both of the trash cans, often overflowing and uncovered. That shit reeks up the entire room and follows me with the big trash bag. Double-sealing the small trash bags doesn't help, the smell of baby shit penetrates any layer of plastic.

Of course I'm not one to take a moralistic viewpoint on well, anything. But if I was, this job would probably turn me into an anti-natalist.