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ziq OP wrote (edited )

I get sensory overload at the fuel station and a guy who works there keeps getting angry and mocking me because i don't realize he's talking to me since he's talking to the back of my head from the other side of the room while I'm trying to focus on paying the teller and responding to her questions

It keeps happening and now i don't think i can go to that fuel station any more. he keeps talking shit about me to all the other employees in a loud and obvious way as I'm leaving

I hate when people standing behind me or on the other side of the room say merry christmas / happy new year / how are you / good morning / etc to me in a room full of people and noise and then get pissy because I don't realize they're talking to me or even hear them at all because I'm wholly focused on the task I'm performing and the person immediately in front of me and on tuning out the noise

he was doing this passive aggressive thing where he was asking me questions and then answering them himself because i wasn't responding and i only realized he was even in the room when he was already well into it and by then it was too late to turn around and react so i just ignored him until i was half way out the door and he started talking way louder and angrier so i turned around and said 'are you talking to me?' and he said 'HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!' and i said ok thanks and I suddenly realized all the people in the room were wholly focused on me and looking at me like i just killed a baby

Also get a lot of hate from people like that because I talk to myself, but I'm just quietly reciting the sequence of tasks I'm performing so i don't forget them. i guess they think i'm insulting them under my breath or something

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ruinsociety wrote

I have a similar issue, especially due to my ADHD. I will just not hear someone talking because I'm focusing on something and they get angry or upset at me. I get serious anxiety thinking about doing things because I might get an interaction like you did.

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andro wrote

Bro I lived like 21 years with this, plus all the other symptoms of adhd, but not knowing I had adhd and thinking that it was all just something wrong with me or was a moral failing or something. I'm so glad so many other people also have this and that it's not just me as I thought for so long.

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monday wrote

It's awful to have to live this shit... I get anxious just to think that i need to go to some places bc of experiences like this. I still don't have a good strategy but I got so anxious that I procrastinate weeks before taking courage.

If it was me I would probably fantasize about flames

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fortmis wrote

he was doing this passive aggressive thing where he was asking me questions and then answering them himself

I suddenly realized all the people in the room were wholly focused on me and looking at me like i just killed a baby

maybe his coworkers were just trying to tell you with their eyes that they have been praying for someone to take this man away and save them from his annoying wrath lol

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admincritiquethrowaway wrote

If we're going to be honest (and I think we should always be honest with ourselves if we truly want to build a more open and communal society) we really shouldn't jump to the conclusion the toxic individual in this scenario is the person ziq admits to ignoring and not even facing while he's wishing him a happy Christmas... Has anyone here ever had an interaction with ziq that wasn't completely hostile and toxic? Some food for thought.

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Majrelende wrote

If someone across the room doesn't hear you, it tends to be a more open and communal response to not mock them and yell at them.

People aren't just as they are for no reason. I, for one, find that every time people act poisonous and entitled to me, I become withdrawn and negative. The more people disrespect me, the less I am inclined to put myself in the trampling zone.

If we're to be honest (and I also think we should always be honest with ourselves if we truly want to build a more open and communal society) we should really not jump to the conclusion that the toxic individual in this scenario was the one who refused to kowtow to someone who was acting like an entitled jerk.

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SnowCode wrote

I think many did, I did. What You're doing is just plain hate though. Ziq expresses their feelings and all you do is just pour hate and adhominem attack on them.

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tuesday wrote

Has anyone here ever had an interaction with ziq that wasn't completely hostile and toxic?

frequently.

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SnowCode wrote

Holy shit, that's aweful. I really hope you will find some peace where you don't have to care about them. Having a lot more stupid chat than usual in this period this is really shitty :(

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Embalo wrote (edited )

I've been going over some feminist points with a friend and I wanted to start a thread here on raddle about how incel shaming is bad for feminism and creepiness is actually perceived as a failure of masculinity rather than as its logical conclusion. But I am yet to arrive at a satisfactory way to frame it to outsiders to our conversations in a way that the point being made is made clear.

I've also been trying to rewatch Primer, after 10 years or so, to better understand it, but I've been too sleepy for it at night. Apart from that, all quiet on the western front, I suppose.

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fortmis wrote

i still believe trees will save the world

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aabbaabb wrote

My baby tree is dying. Is the world doomed?

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fortmis wrote

Oh no!!! What are its symptoms , what kind of tree? there is always hope

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aabbaabb wrote

Apricot. And I've just realized apricots are not evergreen.

I don't know how to describe its state besides it feels looser in its soil than it used to be

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fortmis wrote

Is it winter where u are? It's dropped its leaves? In pot or ground? Doctor is here

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aabbaabb wrote

Yes. Yes. Pot

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fortmis wrote

Fruit trees are generally tricky i find. Apricots like lots of water as long as the pot has good drainage, but generally in winter, plants need less water. How often are u watering it?

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aabbaabb wrote

Been raining a lot recently so not at all

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fortmis wrote

ah, so potted but outdoors. it's probably just in winter zone, inshallah it will wake up in spring <3 <3

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fortmis wrote

Also if you drink tea, put the leaves in your apricot pot after. Tea leaves are high in potassium and phosphorous blah blah etc. Most plants loooovveeeee tea leaves and also sometimes coffee grinds

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JackBinimbul wrote

Just wanted to drop in and say to be aware of what kind of tea it is! A lot of blends have high acidity, for example. Simple black tea? Go for it!

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fortmis wrote

Which teas are super acidic? Also, some plants like acidic soil, so could be helpful to know

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JackBinimbul wrote

Almost all teas will lean acidic, but fruit-based teas will almost always be even more acidic. Lemon tea is also an obvious one.

And you're right about some plants preferring acidic soil! Most berry bushes, for example, do great with it.

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aabbaabb wrote

Had many dreams this week and recorded none, but I still remember three of them.

I've had enough of how badly I'm treated at home, so I leave traveling around to find a place that's better to me. I find a house owned by a lovely fluffy brown bear who's very nice to me, so I start living with them. As we were cuddling we hear a commotion outside. Armed men are coming for us, and we have to escape. I have an idea. We lock every door in house to keep them busy breaking them down, while we climb down the waste pipe on the side of the building. I wake up when we were in the bathroom about to climb out of the window. I hope the bear is ok.

A lone shark just bought this office building. As he goes to explore the empty building to find a rat hiding in there. Moments later the police are coming for the rat because he's suspected of killing his wife. They get into the building and question the shark about the rat, but he tells them he doesn't know anything. Moments later they find the rat and arrest him along with the shark. They both get into prison and share a prison cell. The rat didn't kill his wife, and is grieving her death. The shark observes the rat as he's scrolling through his wife's recordings on his phone, listening to them with tears in his eyes, until he finally cries himself to sleep. While the rat is sleeping the shark puts on wig, some feminine clothing, and tries to gently wake up the rat with a feminine voice. The rat wakes up, sees the shark, quickly jumps away, and asks the shark to explain what he's doing. Shark says he's trying to cheer him up. Rat says this is not helping. Shark asks rat if he could ever love him. Rat says not while shark still has his dick down his legs, so shark looks at rat with a forced smile and tears in his eyes, and tells if he munches down his own dick, will rat love him then? I wake up before rat gives an answer.

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asterism wrote

Oof that shark one. Sort of feel bad for the shark but also ick to the idea of biting anything off my person.

Was confused because at first I thought it was a loan shark and a rat (a snitch).

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aabbaabb wrote

At first I felt bad for rat more than the shark, but you made realize I didn't think about it from the shark's perspective. Now I don't know

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asterism wrote

poor shark is thinking of self-mutilation because the person they love cant accept them for who they are.

But also the Rats got it bad, I mean imagine being confessed to while you are actively mourning your murdered wife. oof.

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fortmis wrote

so wait the loan shark and the rat are both animals and not the human metaphorical equivalents?

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JackBinimbul wrote

I'm new and hesitant to engage on this site because I've been burned so many times before. I am part of so many marginalized identities that I might as well be a Bingo card.

I'm very leftist, but am not an anarchist. White, male libertarians and anarchists have been some of the worst people I've had to deal with after conservatives. "Debate bros" make me want to lock my doors and never have to hear anyone speak ever again.

I'm easing into the community here, but it is with nervous trepidation.

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Vulgar_Soda wrote

Fuck community, a mind phantom that forces people to minimize themselves for the sake of group "harmony." Engage if it feels good, don't if it doesn't.

I'm very leftist, but am not an anarchist.

πŸ€”

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JackBinimbul wrote

I mean, there are other leftists.

There are so many labels out there, both new and old, evolved and devolved, that I have no idea what most of them even mean anymore. It might be apt to describe myself as a "democratic socialist", but a lot of that doesn't sit right with me. A lot of anarchist tenants don't work for me, either.

I'm no philosopher and have no desire to be. I don't want to devote my life to poli-sci. I know that the kind of life I want to live is unrealistic and cannot be sustained at a large scale. I'm not naΓ―ve or arrogant enough to think I have answers to most things.

However, if I could live in a community where all humans have their basic needs met, they contribute what they are able, and people are only "in charge" of what they have expertise in, and I don't have to play stressful social games, I'd probably be happy.

I just want to improve the lives of those around me, not destroy the planet, and to have all of my basic needs met in safety. That is clearly too much to ask.

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tuesday wrote

i really wish the job i interviewed for would call and tell me he hired someone else already so i can get rid of this spark of hope. it's going to be more painful than it needs to be bc of this feeling.

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JackBinimbul wrote

The process of job-seeking is incredibly dehumanizing and demoralizing. I'm sorry that you're stuck in this limbo.

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ziq OP wrote

You'll get the position you need. The universe will put you where you need to be.

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Vulgar_Soda wrote

The universe will put you where you need to be.

Me, on the couch, playing Sonic Frontiers, drinking tea and generally being a useless piece of shit ^-^ Thank you, Universe.

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ziq OP wrote (edited )

wtf is with giganto, it keeps grabbing me and squishing me dead right before I kill it even though i'm not supposed to take damage as super sonic and I still have more than 100 rings. no one on youtube has this problem

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Vulgar_Soda wrote

lol. The start of the boss fight with the music I was like πŸ’ͺπŸ˜€πŸ˜ŽπŸ‘Š UNSTOPPABLE

and then I kept getting knocked back and my ring counter kept inching closer to zero and my couch friend watching was like uhhh are u okay? and I was like πŸ˜³πŸ˜… and then 😱

I just mashed like crazy and eventually won. My poor joycons.

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ziq OP wrote

The switch version? That's rough. I could have pirated it on switch but I bought it for ps4 instead because the switch can barely run it.

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asterism wrote

2nd work finally did the January schedule yesterday. I never get scheduled on Saturdays but this month I got scheduled for two (in addition to my Sunday shift) so theres two weekends where I just dont get a single day off.

Then I rarely do anything with Friends and the one day I have something planned I got scheduled to work

Then I thought my wife said my kids birthday party was going to be a Saturday but its a Sunday and so of course I am scheduled to work during my kids birthday party.

I am just super tired.


Been actively debating stop paying my credit cards and my school loan. My dads cosigned on my school loan so not paying it is a bit backstabby. But like the potential benefit to me would be huge.

I mean worst case scenario the bank sues us both and gets levies against us (or just me), which isnt great though I dont know how likely. But that would sort of make the whole thing pointless

or like my dad just starts paying it off himself

Best case scenario I tank my and my parents credit and the loan company (or a collections agency) offers to settle the debt for way less. Which does happen but sort of depends on my dad playing along and not paying it himself.

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kano wrote

Have got my partner visiting this weekend, which is nice but she's pretty depressed and it's bringing me down too.

Failed a programming challenge earlier this week for a job application but the company seemed boring anyway so I'm calling it a win..

A lot of moving people's stuff and carrying furniture around this week as a bunch of us moved into new renovated rooms upstairs this week and some new people moved in too. Everyone has so much more stuff then I do. Also clearing out rooms downstairs so we can start to renovate them in the next time. I can say it's a nice having a radiator again after spending the last winters heating with a wood stove.

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SnowCode wrote (edited )

I found just the right music for studying so I just done a one shot on my database course and almost finished it. I've done a ton of summaries, and I love doing that, I seems to really help others at school and I love explaining things and releasing them for free.

Also I've been with my lover for my birthday and it was awesome. However her parents came at our place and it was awkward (see my post f/offmychest), but overall it went well.

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