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moonlune wrote (edited )

Actually, straightens glasses,
it's very hard to get to the sun from the earth, because we are orbiting it at 30km/s, this speed the rocket needs to lose before getting closer to the sun otherwise it gets yeeted away by the centrifugal force. The ESA's solar orbiter's wiki has cool graphs and videos if you want to go see what it takes too get close to the sun.

I still hope he dies thought.


zoom_zip OP wrote

well if that won’t work maybe we can hope that an alien parasite burrows into the brain of one of the crew and drives them to insanity so they open the airlock door and jettison jeff into the cold vacuum of space


asg101 wrote

Every billionaire can fuck off to space as far as I care, I just want to see them forced to re-terraform Earth before they try terraforming Mars.


emoticons wrote

considering what they already done to the earth, I would be horrified if they do try re-terraform


ziq wrote

an oil rig every 5 meters


emoticons wrote

oh no


ziq wrote

pigs that slaughter and process themselves


zoom_zip OP wrote

this should be pretty easy to achieve

first you need to get the pigs dependent on a system of artificial scarcity. the way to do this is to produce too much food, but instead of using it to feed the pigs, you just throw it in a landfill.

then you take some of the pigs and you give them a flag and tell them that as long as they are part of the flag group, they are better than the non-flag pigs. tell them that as long as they stick to the doctrine of the flag, they can have some of the food, but only just enough to keep them wanting more. tell them they can earn more eventually if they work hard and stick to the doctrine of the flag, but really they never can. they can only ever have the bare minimum.

then you tell them the non-flag pigs are coming to steal that food that they are only just barely getting enough of! but don’t worry…

weaponise some of the pigs to give everyone that sense of safety. let them know that the weaponised pigs are there to protect them. but really the weaponised pigs are just there to make sure nobody gets any funny ideas like giving the surplus food to the non-flag pigs. surplus food must go in the landfill!!!

over the course of a few years really seed the idea that the non-flag pigs are lesser. make up a bunch of shit about how their brains are different, and how they just want to steal the food, and that when they come to steal the food that is basically pig terrorism and thank the flag we have weaponised pigs to keep us safe from these animals.

give the non-flag pigs a different name. something where people won’t even associate them with pigs. call them “pork” or something so when flag pigs talk about them they don’t even make the connection in their mind to them being pigs

after this you can make some kind of camp to put the porks in (with barbed wire fences or something to keep them separate from the flag pigs). you can offer the flag pigs a little bit more food if they come and put the porks into a blender

after all, porks aren’t even pigs, so it’s not like it hurts. they probably don’t even have feelings. and don’t forget they’re terrorist thieves who want to steal from you.

now the operation is up and running it’s very important to maintain it. keeping people’s trust in weaponised pigs is a good step. you can do this by making lots of movies and tv shows about weaponised pigs saving people from imaginary threats.

the other thing you need to do is deflect any blame onto other animals. yeah, sure, you’re not getting enough food? that’s because we have to give it to the lambs as well. if it wasn’t for those lambs then you could have more food. make them hate the lambs. keep putting surplus in the landfill.


self slaughtering pig operation complete.


lettuceLeafer wrote

Don't forget to leave space for the place for the workers to buy oxygen.

Also I can't wait until scienctists are able to gentically modify pigs so much that they can make some of them pig butcher's and pig husbanders. The glories of techno utopia.


Kinshavo wrote

"everything that goes up must come down" - said the old men with his pipe full of blue mould


fool wrote

"I really thought that the petition would work! How will I ever believe an online petition again!"


rot wrote

if you live near a launchpad...

be the change you want to see or whatever

-some hippy idk