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Syzygy wrote

I wanna fight a decent chunk of my coworkers.

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groovygardener42069 OP wrote

Quit your job and become a professional fighter

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throwaway wrote

That's solid advice, actually.

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groovygardener42069 OP wrote

Depends on how good they are at fighting

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throwaway wrote

Getting beaten up is, to a certain degree, a pretty lively thing. It's much like taking a cold shower, just with the added bonus of blood and broken bones.

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zoom_zip wrote

i can’t remember what it feels like to not be in constant physical pain

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mofongo wrote

That's me, I took a painkiller last night before going up to sleep. First time in I don't know how long that I can stand up without effort. Even lifting my kids is fast and easy. Not an advice though.

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groovygardener42069 OP wrote

Grow poppies m8

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mofongo wrote

Don't know where to get seeds.

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groovygardener42069 OP wrote

Grocery store seeds are viable. Any major gardening seed distributor will have cultivars to choose from as well. There are vendors on etsy, ebay, etc but that's not really necessary honestly

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zoom_zip wrote

yeah, i just don’t want to be that dude popping vicodin like it’s candy for the rest of my life. maybe just for a few weeks to give myself a break

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temtemy wrote

I don't feel like doing my online academics. Procrastination is very addictive

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groovygardener42069 OP wrote

As and Bs may aim to please, but Cs get degrees baby

I suggest doing ten minutes of the bare minimum daily - like if you have a paper, just drop some knowledge in your notes app while you're taking a shit. Ten minutes, that's all. Rub one out one less time than you otherwise would.

Alternatively: amphetamine is a strong motivator, but also addictive. your mileage may vary

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masque wrote (edited )

I was going to sign up for an anti-procrastination seminar thing, but I kept putting it off and missed the deadline.

EDIT: Also, the oregano that I grow indoors has leaves turning yellow & falling off, and I don't know if I'm watering it too much or not enough.

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groovygardener42069 OP wrote

You don't need a seminar to keep you from procrastinating lol. That sounds like an "underachievers networking seminar." Just go to any bar within a mile of your nearest college.

Also, stick your finger in the dirt. If it's dry, you're not watering enough. If it's wet, you're watering too much

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celebratedrecluse wrote

I don't have enough money for how much time I sell.

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groovygardener42069 OP wrote

You just need to walk right up to your bossman, and with a firm handshake look 'em right in the eyes and demand that raise at gunpoint. It's that kind of assertiveness that will get you ahead in the workplace

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mofongo wrote

My neighbor's cigarette smoke gets into my bedroom and they're a serial smoker that wake up early and goes to bed late.

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groovygardener42069 OP wrote

  1. Fart on their cigarettes

  2. Put some plants between where you sleep and where they smoke

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[deleted] wrote

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groovygardener42069 OP wrote

As many as you want. The leaves collect dust and particulate matter in the air, so something thick and shrubby would be good. Is it coming through a window, wall, vent?

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CameronNemo wrote

I keep procrastinating. Have no motivation to "play the game" so to speak. No leads on how to change the rules of "the game".

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groovygardener42069 OP wrote

Step one - lie on your resume

Step two - get a job that you're not really qualified for

Step three - ride that shit until you crash and burn

Step four - repeat 2x

Step five - now you have three fancy ass jobs to put on your resume and you don't have to lie anymore

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CameronNemo wrote

Wait where is the bad advice?

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groovygardener42069 OP wrote

Well, it's bad for the hiring manager who has to explain to the CEO/CHRO why they went ahead and hired someone without actually calling references or running a background check first, which is much more common than you'd think

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snack wrote

reading this thread was such an experience, it needed its own soundtrack. which is why i listened to cardi b's song of the same name while clicking up 42 times

if it's UP
then it's UP
this is UP
clickin UP
that's an UP \

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