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noordinaryspider wrote (edited )

Gone. No idea where. Never will. He went willingly. Not interested in knowing any more.

What's their issue with you?

It appears to be one of those weird old corrupt Southern families. Probably not a good idea for me to dig too deep right now. I still want to doxx them so I put up a bit more information in the appropriate forum, but getting angry about the latest generation is counterproductive.

I wish with every fibre of my being that I could help my kids and that's what's always made me crack before, how they always roped me back in.

Yes, I do have to turn off everything I feel for my kids like a light switch if I'm going to get myself together enough to go down to the squat but that wasn't helping.

They're just gone.

I feel phantom kids around me the same way an amputee would feel phantom pain in the leg that isn't there any more, but the phantom kids aren't real. There is only me. I haven't been singular in over 30 years. This alone is a strange, disconcerting, and frightening sensation.

I can't help my kids.

3

ziq wrote (edited )

I know you're in a bad place but this is a 10 year old kid, kids can be mean but it doesn't stop them from loving their mother unconditionally.