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3

raindropq wrote

when i was a kid my Grandpa drew a cartoon of me as "flag bearer" standing atop a mountain, victoriously raising-up the Family name. he told me it was my responsibility to carry on our lineage.

i think that might have contributed -in part- to my social anxiety complex.

1

noordinaryspider wrote

I was supposed to inherit "Uncle Alex's farm", which was the proceeds of the reimbursement to the owner of the land where the city of Chicago was built. He was off panning for gold at the time.

It went for taxes, medical care, retirement condos, helping me pay the lawyers for my kids' custody cases, etc. and anything that's left over is going to my parents' colleges when they die.

How do I describe over 30 years of being a usually single homeschooling full-time frequently solo always radical and nonconventional and marginalized parent who sometimes took on boring meaningless side jobs for extra cash to a 20-30 something?

I don't. I just murmer, act evasive, and talk about my iatrogtenic disabilities or how hard it is to find a job scrubbing toilets for minimum wage with this ugly face or change the subject to funny pictures of cats or ask them to help me with my computer or something.

And the world swirls by, somewhere safely outside my door......

Gramma for sale or rent Used cuddly lap for fifty cent No smartphone no pool but I've got a pet I don't smoke no cigarettes...

3

noordinaryspider wrote

It's good to have a word for it. I think it's also healthy to use the word to describe the class of elders who will never have grandchildren and people who are of biological reproductive age but for whatever reason cannot become parents.

We're animals. We have bodies. We have natural drives to procreate. Many of us have longstanding hopes and plans and dreams of a future that involved passing along knowledge, experiences, and unique family traditions to the next generation.

It hurts and I think we have a right to talk about it, laugh and cry on each others shoulders, and share what works and doesn't work for Plan B., i.e., "No, I already tried that. The neighbours thought I was a creepy pervert when I offered to babysit for free."