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GaldraChevaliere wrote

Gender and sexuality, while often intertwined, are far from synonymous. I understand the point you want to make, but it's a mistake that often leads to further confusion and misunderstanding down the line.

Speaking from a trans femme perspective, but one that's generally aggressive towards 'fixed' perceptions of gender, the way I feel about my body is more androgynous than anything. I don't feel wholly within the boxes of male or female, including in their 'traditional' gender performance (a very young and christo-eurocentric thing). I feel feminine, in that my appearance and my attitudes are mostly within that set of boxes, and certainly identify more with woman- than manhood.

But I also feel that to wholly immerse myself within those boxes would be inauthentic and alienating to me as a fully formed person, and living within the grey zone (problematically referred to as being a 'trap' by most people I've met and occasionally myself self-deprecatingly) is where I feel most complete and fulfilled. My experiences and my upbringing have led to having a much different life than a cis man or woman have had, and I feel a deep kinship and solidarity to other trans* and gender non-conforming folk for the bulk of those shared struggles, but I am not wholely like a transwoman who is definitively a woman either.

I guess the tl;dr is that as a person, addressing this wholely philosophically because I don't want to get super into the neurology or hormonal aspects right now, I am almost completely alienated to the western modern world's perception of sex and gender. I am only me, and what I want is the freedom to live as only me, and not as a lover's dirty little secret or an 'ally's' pawn or a cishet man's easy fuck and murder victim. I cannot pursue that freedom authentically by forcing myself to be one thing or another when neither are who I am.