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3

RedEmmaSpeaks wrote

It left out "Projection." Toxic people/abusers almost invariably accuse their victims of crimes that they, themselves, are committing.

1

Tequila_Wolf wrote

I'd love to read more about this (and also post it to f/Abuse) if you know anything good to read.

2

RedEmmaSpeaks wrote

I don't know under what threads to put these or if I should start my own, but here are a few links, I've found to be useful. Again, Projection is a standard tool used by Abusive A-holes into Gaslighting.

Rational Wiki's page on Psychological Projection: http://rationalwiki.org/wiki/Psychological_projection

This thing on Domestic Violence is a good primer about tactics used by abusers: https://www.helpguide.org/articles/abuse/domestic-violence-and-abuse.htm#understanding

Though, this article goes more into detail about something everyone needs to remember about abusers/toxic individuals. Basically no matter what they say, they're not out of control; they know exactly what they are doing.

Article: https://www.healthyplace.com/blogs/verbalabuseinrelationships/2012/07/how-abusers-gain-control/

2

Tequila_Wolf wrote

Thanks for this. Yeah, each of these could fit quite happily as their own posts in f/Abuse.
I'll try to have a look at them properly when I have the energy.