Recent comments in /f/Sex_Work

lettuceLeafer wrote

oh for sure, I was disagreeing with the statement that that is how all sex worker feel. If an individual wants to view it as serial rape that is totally valid. This article was using the experiences of some sexworkers to infantilize sex workers who don't view it as serial rape. Thats why I didn't like it. If the article said that a few sex workers view it as serial rape that would be one thing. It was claiming that is the experience of all sex workers and then called them all prostitutes which is def a term that many sex workers don't want to be called.

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Catsforfun wrote (edited )

as a former fssw, I think that if people need to label their experience serial rape or make such comparisons, then that is their experience and its valid af

edit- I want to add that I'm not a swerf but feel disgusted by the glamorization/normalization of sw almost much as i do by sesta/fosta

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Raxalor wrote

Reply to comment by Anarcat in by !deleted23972

I agree. Hell, they could have even released a proprietary android app that you download via their website directly. A few other adult oriented platforms do that already.

Seems to be yet another example of an internet platform exploiting sex workers and immediately throwing them under the bus after sex workers make the platform viable.

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Raxalor wrote

Reply to comment by nbdy in by !deleted23972

They're basically gonna ban most sex work. Nudity is fine, but any content with "sexually explicit conduct" is banned.

They're going to release more details soon, but they seem to want to get an app in the Apple App Store and Google Play Store, both of which explicitly exclude any distribution of pornographic material. It's why Patreon and Tumblr both banned that content.

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lettuceLeafer wrote

Reply to comment by !deleted23972 in by !deleted23972

Idk I remember people on Reddit talking about how there are lots of barriers for profiting off porn. Only fans was in some kinda grey area. Payment processers was one of the big ones I remember. I don't remember the details exactly but I have been thinking that something like this would happen to only fans initially just my reasoning for that came so long ago that I don't quite remember why I felt that way.

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nbdy wrote

Reply to by !deleted23972

Isn’t this just for one specific thing so they can compete with Patreon? But they won’t be kicking sw off the platform or anything?

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lettuceLeafer wrote

Reply to by !deleted23972

It sounds kinda ridiculous but it was inevitable. Only fans was a website skirting the line that many couldn't believe that it lasted as long as it did.

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SJWarCleric OP wrote

Reply to comment by masque in The Porn Crisis That Isn’t by SJWarCleric

I totaly get what you're saying but I also am suspicious of the overapplication of the word "addiction."And while the self-reported cases of "porn addiction" might be overreported due to relifious guilt, I'm sure there are legitimate cases of addiction that involves porn. (If not addiction proper, I've heard there have been damaging cases of ADHD and OCD where it becomes a fixation that takes over the person's life. Like a "shopping addiction" or "gaming addiction" I'm not sure that I feel comfortable with the colloquial "addiction" in those cases.) Also I suspect it's a bit of a tricky issue due to being less of a substance and more of a behavior? Perhaps "compulsion" is a better word. For example, when my anxiety gets high for an extended period, I develop certain cleaning compulsions that feel out of my control. But I'm not addicted to cleaning?

I suppose there's a sort of chicken-egg thing of "which came first" that could be considered in cases of addiction (of any kind.) Between self-medication (or in the case of porn, self-soothing) due to stress/trauma VS how someone is wired causing them to become dependent on an action or substance. Which I believe is somewhat debated, at least between the colloquial sense of addiction vs the actual biological processes.

So, as a personal example. I'm asexual. I don't have an interest in having sex unless my partner wants to, and even then it's probably not going to happen. I generally don't have a libido either. But occasionally when I'm on my period, it's easier to just masturbate as a method of helping with cramps and weird feelings, that to me are otherwise alien. I have no shame about it (not religious) but it's inconvenient and I'd rather spend time doing something else. But when my symptoms get really bad, I will "give in" to the urge. (This is like, once a month maybe. When my symptoms are really heinous it might be a multiple times a day sort a thing. But then I'll also go for months without needing to. Just depends on the particular period.) I don't believe that this means I'm addicted to masturbating.

I also eat and drink water and take medications and use the restroom even though I'd rather not have to lol

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tabby wrote (edited )

I guess where you and I disagree is that I think there's sufficient evidence for behavioral addictions (sex, porn, food, gambling, video games, internet browsing, exercise, etc.) due to the way the brain's reward system works and the modern environment. These addictions can begin as ways to cope with trauma similar to how exogenous chemicals can (note that I didn't say that porn is the same as meth or heroin). Watching too much porn can change the brain, and, for people for whom those changes are unwanted or deleterious, abstaining from porn for a while, or just cutting down, can be beneficial.

I'm not a fundamentalist. I don't think that all porn is bad or unhealthy, that all porn actors and actresses are abused, coerced, or exploited, or that everyone who watches porn has a problem. Sex is good (though not unqualifiedly good). I am, however, suspect of the eroticization of sadomasochism, domination and submission in much porn (and in some of my own tastes and fantasies), and much of porn is informed by and perpetuates patriarchy and rape culture.

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tabby wrote (edited )

I was raised Christian, and even though I'm non-religious now, I still have brainworms from it that I can't, and probably never will, be able to completely kill no matter how much Stirner I read. Fuck me, right?

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tabby wrote

A Mormon who has two beers on a Friday night and then beats himself up about it for a week cause he betrayed god isn't an alcoholic, no.

When I'm talking about porn addicts, that's not what I'm talking about at all. I'm not talking about someone who watches porn for 10-15 minutes while they rub one out and then go on with their day. I doubt this kind of person is going to feel much guilt or shame about doing so.

Based on the typical r/pornfree self-report, and, again, on my own experiences, I'm talking about people who are watching porn every day, sometimes multiple times a day, for an hour or more at a time, flipping from one video to the next, watching increasingly extreme genres over time, and who can't keep an erection or orgasm during sex and can't not recall porn scenes during sex rather than being present with their partners. I'm talking about people ignoring their responsibilities, hygiene, and health to watch porn.

I'm certainly not saying "porn made me do it". In my case, porn addiction wasn't the cause of my problems at the time but a symptom of other things that were wrong in my life and my marriage, but it was real nonetheless.

I don't know why everyone here seems to have a problem with any kind of criticism of porn consumption.

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tabby wrote

Reply to comment by masque in The Porn Crisis That Isn’t by SJWarCleric

Right, just as drinking alcohol isn't morally bad but it's addictive and someone could become concerned with his or her own alcohol consumption not because it's bad but because he or she recognizes signs of addiction.

From my own past experiences and reading those of other men, porn use definitely can, and does, become problematic, and it doesn't make sense to say that it does so solely because we chose it and not at least partly because it's addicting.

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masque wrote

Believing that porn is morally “bad” is strongly correlated with feeling like you have an addiction to pornography, regardless of how much porn you actually watch. “The best predictor of self-perceived sexual-use problems, like pornography addiction, is high levels of religiosity,” says Bryant Paul, a media professor at Indiana University and a faculty affiliate of the Kinsey Institute, which studies human sexuality. “It’s a better predictor than actual amounts of use.”

People keep saying this, but surely if you actively "want" to not do something (i.e. on the level of your conscious values) but repeatedly give in to the urge to do it anyways it potentially makes sense to conceive of that as an addiction?

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__0 wrote

Reply to by !deleted23972

Why don't they just let people who are involved in the trade have a say in the laws that affect them?

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