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fortifiedmischief OP wrote

also does anyone know who wrote Kill The Couple? I can't find an author listed anywhere, not even a pseudonym -- i can only trace it back to the cryptic Ungrateful Hyenas.

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metocin wrote

Its a worthwhile critique, although as someone in a committed monogamous relationship, it's not enough to make me break that up. It certainly made me more critical of my relationship, and I think that if it ended for some reason I would avoid monogamy in the future.

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fortifiedmischief OP wrote

one of my favourite parts of the text was near the end when they say "ok so we know you're thinking about going to your loved one and bringing all these new ideas down on the relationship but just hold on."
and they went on to talk about how this "kill the couple" idea really makes roots when you use it to address conflict from a perspective that isn't "couple-focused," and instead see how you bring your own shit to the table - your own expectations, preconceptions, old-world narratives etc.

at least that's how I interpreted it... applying these new ideas as a a way of developing clarity and autonomy, free of "the couple" concept. do you remember the part I'm talking about?

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metocin wrote

Vaguely, yeah its been a while since I read it. I think couples are a lot more realistic when they have shed those expectations and traditions. My partner is not particularly old-fashioned but has some traditional expectations that I encourage them to critique. I think that people who expect a monogamous relationship to work have to be very critical about the way they think it will work. This zine is definitely helpful in rethinking a lot of commonly held ideas about relationships.

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fortifiedmischief OP wrote

ya definitely. do you know of any similar texts??

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metocin wrote

Pretty sure I read something similar but can't remember the title. If I find it I'll post the link.

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