cis out of the woods

Should I identify as queer?

Submitted by lachsarb in Queer (edited )

Without giving away too much detail, I can easily pass as a cishet male. But I don't feel like I really care about identifying with my gender assigned to me at birth, and my sexuality revolves more around biological sex rather than gender. So by definition I might be considered bi, even though I'm only interested in people who are biologically female or maybe intersex. I'm also questioning my romantic orientation which will probably take me years to understand.

I ask because I don't suffer from gender dysphoria, and I am unlikely to run into any issues because of whoever I may have a relationship with. I feel like even though by definition I could be considered queer, I don't want to take away from the struggles that other queer people go through. I have trans and gay friends who actually struggle because they are queer, whereas I don't.

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Fool wrote (edited )

my sexuality revolves more around biological sex rather than gender... biologically female or maybe intersex

May I see your methodology for determining suitable partners? \

Do you make sure to test their genes? \

Do you conduct detailed audit of their genitals, to confirm surgery has been undergone?
Only T-Man penis for you!

How can you tell the difference between intersex and male Wang? Taste?

All this before meeting for a cup of coffee?

Sounds exhausting.


While I largely relate with your sentiment, I just want to sum up the absurdity of the words you have used.

I think that you wanted to say,
"In my experience I have found greater sexual attraction to people with vaginas compared to penii."

But since you have expressed yourself in this way, it asks the questions in your mind, why does the thought of a (non trans-male or intersex) penis cause such aversion that you need to put it as a disclaimer to your sexual identity?

Don't want to be put in the same category as "those" people?

Would dating a Trans-Woman change your identity?

👻


Now back to the actual question.

What do you take away from others by being "Queer"?

What does the word "Queer" mean to you?

Do you need to tell the world that you are "Queer"?

Do you just want confirmation that your thoughts for yourself are valid?

Is there something wrong with being "Queer"?

Does "Queer" have to relate to sexuality and gender?

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mofongo wrote

I try to avoid post on queer for obvious reasons, but time to intervene and put some tracks. You don't need to answer, but these are things you should consider.

  1. Why do you do feel the need to call yourself queer, or more specifically, why do you feel you need permission to call yourself queer? Specially before answering or finding acceptance on your own gender questions.

  2. Why do you consider other People's genitals important for your own orientation?

  3. This was sort of implied, but you should look why your first consideration on a partner is how you would sex them, instead of other parts of their personhood.

  4. Finally, I think this part answers your own question:

I ask because I don't suffer from gender dysphoria, and I am unlikely to run into any issues because of whoever I may have a relationship with.

In short, you're not trans, because you mostly identify with your GAB. You're not gay, considering your dislike of having sex with anyone with a penis (a common belief among macho cis men).

So, the final question is, why do you want to be considered queer again?

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NOISEBOB wrote (edited )

Redacted

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