Submitted by lettuceLeafer in OnLettuceLeafersAuthority (edited )

So when I imagine this I imagine this sexual experiences are more impromptu, they end abruptly sometimes not, orgasms are irrelevant, penetration is often not an element, the idea of sex and intimacy is blurred so as to have no binary.

I imagine engaging in sex acts that both parties enjoy and far before any orgasms occur I without notice say "allright I had my fun. I want to read a book now. With some rant about the abolishing of time and societal expectations. So don't feel self conscious that I (the chairman) don't follow those expectations. If u assume I want them then u will always feel like I don't enjoy your company.

I enjoyed having some sex, but I decided there would be more marginal utility in enjoyment of a books. And rather than continue on to achieve some societally normal end I just end it exclusively on my terms. There are no differences in beginnings and ends they are all the same. A begining middle and every moment is a potential end and begining. An orgasm or two is not the stopping point. So I think this queering of experiences would be really interesting to try out in an testing out as an acting of testing out this theory and an act of challenging societal normalcy.

Because let's face facts most people have only had sex in a way that is basically pornography. Society is the directory puppeteering people. They feel they must have sex X way and continue until Y ( men cumming) or feminist version (man and woman cum). And in case of homosexual relationships gender shall be forced into the act. The butch woman is the penetrator and man. The fem Man is the penetrated and woman.

I'm serious this is how people do it. They don't start and stop based on what they enjoy, they start and stop when society tells them to. They bring gendered assumptions and actions into it. They start how society tells them to start. They treat their partner how society tells them to. What is an acceptable performance isn't judged by enjoyment but the judging eye of expectations. And if it doesn't follow the script the actors will feel terrible and shame themself rather than enjoying it. Also what is considered sex is entirely made up too.

This is true for basically everything. Societal norms kinda puppet people into place as they function as gods basically. Hence why I really like thinking of odd thing that aren't societally a thing to do. And make a conscious choice and resist the pulling of my strings by God.

So I bring up sex because It's a fun example. And it's a particularly ridiculous example bc it's usually two people completely alone and not seen. The reality though is they are still performing from all of societies eyes playing their performance. Which is just ridiculous because no one can possibly fucking know.

Hence why whatever academics maybe deleuze or Foucault maybe not I can barely comprehend anything those old farts say to be honest said that states are entirely of mind. They are thought up and their imagination in our minds is how they form. So this socially ingraining becomes obvious in the bedroom as many societal constraints are gone. No one is watching so You see societies control come from within. People are possessed so they are fulfilling their gods will even in the bedroom. Potentially sacrificing great pleasure. But maybe the possession is so great that autonomy would be less desirable. As pleasing their God is the only way they can feel happy. Sex isn't joy of orgasming. Is joy from orgasming because god told you to.

Alright that's it. I'm done. Fuck conclusions. Time is a lie.

Sike.

P.s. I use they to otherwise the masses so I sound cool. But the reality is I'm just as much under control of these gods as everyone else. Tho Morpheus (raddle) has respilled me hard so I at least notice I'm under control sometimes. I'm like neo but instead of dodging bullets I wipe my ass with my hand.

I havnt seen the matrix I only know the two memes btw.

Allright I'm done.

Has Any One Read Anything on the Experience of Being Gendered and the Pseudo Mysogyny of Femininity and The Forcing of Womanly Roles of Those who are the Penetrative Partner?

AskRaddle

*Upvote

*Downvote

/U/lettuceLeafer

I ask this because I have a ton of experiences with this. When I dress more femininely not even close to passing people treat me way different. And gay men push me into an exclusively bottoming role and a pseudo womanly role. Instead of an equal it's a role of an inferior. And much more objective going language of acting upon me instead of with me is used.

And honestly I actually hate penetrative sex. There is so much obvious oppressive gender in it I hate. I really don't care penetrating or penetrated. Tho I have no desire to be penetrated due to the gender roles and actions forced on upon me via mysogyny. Men talk to me way differently and it almost certainly would get worse. So honestly the gender of it really turns me off.

And honestly it creeps me out when people like it because the gender seems obvious. Part of me wonders if they just don't experience it the other way so they never notice the different treatment. It's honestly really fucking crushing and insufferable. And I can't find anything about it with good search. And I havnt read anything. Tho I would be astonished if there was nothing.

P.s. you thought after all that I would submit myself to raddle normalcy and end my post with the end post button. Jesus that would be ridiculous of me of me. I ended it and didn't press end post. Instead I decided to write another post. And the typical end was subverted to subvert the typical begining of a post. Take that posting structure.

Post 3

I was also thinking I have some thoughts on eating with my hands so when I cook how can I stir boiling water without utensils. This is a inte

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Comments

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lettuceLeafer OP wrote

Also to the critics who say. (You end all your posts with the end post button). You are incorrect. You only see the posts I end with the end post button. You don't see the ones I never press the button. Which is frequent.

I wrote up a essay on love joy and gintama. Spent a couple hours got bored then closed the tab because there is no future so I won't save it for a future I don't believe it. I don't need that baggage held onto. I enjoyed it and let it go.

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Majrelende wrote

Whenever there are two people, they seem to reproduce a culture, and often it seems that the only way to avoid it is to be alone. I imagine if they were both well-read in Zerzan it might be possible, but anyways it is extremely difficult. We usually look at other people with the expectation of being judged, and I think that is part of our trauma living under authority. Every other person we see as a microcosm of Society, capable of judging us in its place.

Except in very close relationships maybe, whatever form-- friendships, marriage, otherwise amorous or familial, where there is little to no fear of judgement and the self/other distinction becomes blurred.

I could say something about language and connotation and their formation right now but I will restrain myself.

And about stirring boiling water with your hand... if that doesn't end up well maybe some twigs from a non-poisonous tree would work to do the same.

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lettuceLeafer OP wrote

I don't think it's groups. I think individuals are just as capable of shaming and expectations and encouraging culture. Plenty of people do all kinds of weird cultural norms all alone.

And for the second thing it was more my hope of being an IRL shonen protagonist. Basically have such calloused hands that I stir the food with my hand. Wasn't really looking for a solution. I just wanted to look cool.

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lettuceLeafer OP wrote

Someone wrote up about how penetration even implies active and passivity that was good. But they deleted it.

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[deleted] wrote

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Loof wrote

Well, I'd say it can be either way.

Though if one side isn't active, it's probably crap.

If neither side is active...

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Bezotcovschina wrote

Damn you! After this post I had a dream this night that I participate in a cool gay-orgy, where almost all participants weren't even naked and had sex by all the means but penetration. Words, touches, glances. Such a bummer waking up!

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roanoke9 wrote

I had a long reply but it did not satisfy me. I like this post a lot. It seems similar to some of my thoughts on sex and societal preconditioning. Though I agree with atopos that attaching binary roles to penetrative sex is simply another aspect of that conditioning. Even the division we customarily assign between sex and all other nonsex activities is a societal constraint and creates an artificial binary. And, I will add that breaking this preconditioning is fun? exhilerating? the opposite of deja vu? Whenever language seems at a loss, I use it as a clue that something very interesting is being approached, attempted? grasped for?

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wednesday wrote

is this related to the transactional nature of sex? if it's a transaction then it needs to be a thing with a defined start and end so we can say it happened.

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roanoke9 wrote (edited )

That's definitely a facet of what I was talking about. Forcing something ineffable into an arbitrary box can take many forms and of those transactions is one. Pics or it didn't happen is another facet: if it wasn't recorded it didn't count. The arbitrary division between sexual and platonic interactions is another: kiss on the lips: sexual, kiss on the cheek: platonic (using US norms). It reminds me metaphorically of an early point in my art study (grade-school) when I was obsessed with the idea that drawings have outlines but the world as I see it does not. Outlines in a drawing are a shortcut, a visual heuristic, but they don't actually exist. Once we extract the outlines from a thing and pretend the outline is that thing, we have lost nearly all of that thing. Preconditioned sex-roles are even worse though, because they aren't even an outline, more of a stick-figure bathroom door label simplification with only a tangential relation to any individual person.

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