My first hunting trip was quite eventful I must've been about 5 or 6 An essential rite of passage For those consigned here with a dick Shot size 5 was recommended for A clean, efficient kill They laughed as I cried And stroked his blood-soaked iridescent quills
Don't recall just how I got there To the hatchery, I mean Stumbled through the bush on a field trip And there it stood in front of me I stooped down upon the concrete pad To verify what I was seeing The aftermath of stomping boots Upon hundreds of tiny, helpless beings
Hello despair and booze-fueled rage How do you do, my gilded cage?
Stupid chick on the conveyor belt Staring at her severed foot Stupid pig despairing at the sight Of his companion on a hook You ever see that stupid cow chasing the truck That drove off with her calf? Stupid lower order, always good, good for a good laugh
Debarked Declawed Defanged Dehorned Wings clipped Toes cut Branded Teeth pulled
Farewell despair and booze-fueled rage How do you do, soon-to-be-emptied cage?