Addiction to porn, thinking about sex

Submitted by pata in MentalWellbeing

Hello. Not sure if this is the place to post this but here I go

I am constantly thinking about sex. All the time. I masturbate once or twice a day, always with porn. Sometimes I do it in public places, like in a public bathroom or in a gym shower (yikes). I've even done it in my car on the way home a couple times. I just constantly think about either porn, or I see an attractive person and think about sex with them.

I feel ashamed because I never aim to objectify people but recently I just can't stop thinking about having sex with every attractive person I see. I don't think it seeps out into my behavior very much but often I'll catch myself staring at people.

I have a partner in a loving relationship and we have sex occasionally but it's not a priority. I don't even feel deprived; if anything I just want to masturbate over thoughts very often.

What's going on with me, and can anyone share helpful tips?

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6c_6f_76_65 wrote

Do you feel there is anything you are missing in your relationship: physical, mental, emotional, or spiritual? After you have sex with your partner is there a craving for anything or do you have thoughts that are disappointing? Search wide on this.... Do you wish the sex was a little rougher, longer, something different done....? Do you feel totally satisfied?

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pata OP wrote

I suppose I want sex to be longer and more exploratory

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6c_6f_76_65 wrote

This is my NON-professional opinion.

I would start with opening up a conversation with your partner about what changes can be made to be longer and more exploratory. Also, ask their opinions about what can be changed to help them.

I would not go down the 'addiction' route yet. I would put all of my effort into removing any negatives in the relationship and making sure both of your needs are being met.

Will be glad to give more advice if you want.

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celebratedrecluse wrote

"if everything desired is objectified, then maybe eroticism, needs to be redefined?"

  • Propagandhi, "Refusing to be a Man"
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bloodrose wrote

I used to struggle with an unbearably high libido. I, too, masturbated in bathrooms because I just needed relief. It turned out to be side effects of medication I was on and once I got off of meds, my libido returned to a normal monthly cycle. I still have a few days a month that I have sex on the brain, but I also have whole weeks where I get to have my brain to my damn self for thinking about real thoughts. You may want to look to see if there is a physiological cause. I understand how debilitating this can be. hugs There were nights where my self-talk about myself was less than kind because of the high libido.

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pata OP wrote

Hmm, not on any medication but I always wondered if it's a condition or something. Something I'm embarrassed about is that I get an erection all the time. I can't sleep at night without waking up with one. It's really annoying and my partner got used to it but it definitely made them uncomfortable at doesn't, probably still does.

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bloodrose wrote

So, just gonna say waking up with an erection every morning is 100% normal and is a sign of a well-functioning heart. If you stop waking up with them, get your heart checked. :)

But I understand the embarrassment. I've been there. <3

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rot wrote

try cutting down on how often you watch porn + what 6c_ said

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gre12345 wrote

Hdjdhfjhdggx hoje mesmo já

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Chylan wrote

I have literally the same "issue". For me, the best way to deal with it is acceptance (may or may not work for you). I mean, it was disturbing when I was younger, but then I've thought: "What the fuck? I harm no one masturbating twice a day! My body, likely, knows better what it needs." No I'm completely fine with it. Anyways, rays of support to you, comrade! Hope you find a solution!

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