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OldHippieChick wrote

Yes, exactly.

My grandfather died when I was four and I will never really know whether he caused my mother's suicide attempt or narrowly saved her life. I wish I did. He is effectively annihilated, not just dead, and if I had known he was 100% blameless, I would have told my kids about him.

He MUST have been a bit of a radical to wear a leather watchband when they were so out of style that a four year old kid had never seen one before and sat there like a "good little girl" staring transfixed at a goddamnedmotherfuckingcocksucking WATCH, for pete's sake, but when it's the only memory you've got, you can milk it for all it's worth if you need to badly enough.

Rest in pieces, Big Bob; you're still googleable but you were never big enough to keep your kid from making you not exist any more.