Submitted by [deleted]
on May 30, 2021 at 2:18 AM in MentalWellbeing
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I kinda feel you here, I live in a city and it kinda freaks me out sometimes, I feel like part of it is sensory overload sometimes, but also this perception that so much of the infrastructure of the city is hostile architecture, how we all put so much into maintaining infrastructure that isn't meant for us... I feel resentment towards the structures that tower above me, sometimes that resentment almost overwhelming, the feeling that the sidewalks is a barrier between my feet and the earth below sometimes I imagine the sewers stretching endless miles below, all the piss and shit of people who can't afford to live any building that isn't scheduled for demolition etc etc etc. Sometimes this feeling of the city being so inherently oppressive, crushes me emotionally into a state of paranoia, depression, anger, or mania. Listening to the endless sirens responding to overdoses, or sometimes at night the eerie silence of a city where people can't afford the time to walk the streets when off work.
I usually don't tend to have fear, but my anxiety is going through the roof lately, and I almost can feel the city engulfing me.
Your description is very relatable, the only places I really feel "relaxed" is on the mountain in the city outskirts. But then there will be lots of people feeling the same so it's a crowded spot.
Anthropophobia sounds like fear of humans/social interaction as opposed to cities, and I think MeowyAsh isn't referring exactly to being with people. So maybe enochlophobia would better encapsulate what you were trying to say there, too.
Sensory overload could possibly be related to some sort of executive function condition such as attention deficit conditions or obsessive compulsive conditions.
The fear of situations which over stimulate you could then manifest as anxiety masking the original cause.
Overstimulation can be a lot more common than people think, with the phrase "I can't even hear myself think".
Lots of little things add up, especially various little aches and itches, which you might not even notice. Heck, maybe even things like greater usage of various radio wavelengths for wifi or certain types of light pollution, which you normally don't have as much contact with.
I'm not trying to make you paranoid of these things, but there's plenty of signs that some people have less tolerance for various things, which can be hard to isolate.
I'm not saying anything is definite, I'm just working through these things for myself and like to share knowledge.
Apparently there are no accepted words for city-fear. Maybe Politophobia?
I have a kind of reaction to being in cities too, although it is far less pronounced and maybe of a different cause; it is more a feeling of unease. I know that there is a change that comes over the mind going into a city. For me it is a feeling of floating, like the soil and stone of existence are gone and the only things left are symbols and images, that pull the mind apart. The wild life that I usually see is gone, and that life is real, and I am accustomed to that life; in a city I find it is replaced with an assertive, symbolic capitalist emptiness.
About politophobia, I made it up. I may not be good with making up English words, so if something seems wrong, feel free anyone to correct it.