Recent comments in /f/CollapseSupport

nihilistique OP wrote (edited )

One thing that really bothers me is that when I look up stuff about hyper-empathy online, in so many of the results I see it is framed negatively as having "too much" empathy and stuff. I don't think I have "too much" empathy, I think the problem is that there are people who are willing to take advantage of that empathy, and empathy isn't really something that is encouraged by the societies we tend to live in anyways.

I like how emotional I get, and as much as I experience negative emotions very deeply and get extremely drained from it, one of the best feelings to me is experiencing joy to such a degree that I am unable to process it. Usually that happens when I am able to contribute to someone else being happy. Honestly, I wouldn't give any of the emotions I experience up to make life more "tolerable".

3

suk wrote

Hello, fellow hyper-empathic Autie :)

I know exactly what you mean, and it's exhausting. I've had 50 years on this planet coping and have two kids who go through it too. I wish there were shortcuts but I often find the news and people's apathy to it soul destroying and still go through these periods. It's one of the many things that make you, you and I'd rather be like this than apathetic even if I with it came with a volume knob :)

The school thing is both important and not important. In the long term it won't matter but doing it now will make the next few years a lot easier so it's probably worth getting through so there is less stress in the next few years and you have the energy to direct the anger you feel in something other than surviving.

3

nihilistique OP wrote

Thank you for this, it is helpful to have people to relate to. Sometimes I do feel alone with my emotions, as I'm autistic, and I recently learned about a term called "hyper-empathy". From how I experience and understand this, it seems I experience this on a more extreme end, as I can be extremely emotionally affected by forms of pain other people experience that are treated as "normal" or "small", and it can be really draining for me.

8

Lettuce wrote

Yeah I think most on this site have felt like this. It's a very common experience bc it's a reasonable way to react to the world and all it's horrors. Crying bc life is rough is reasonable and ok. The world is complicated and hard it's okay to not know what to do. Everyone realizes they don't have all the answers at some point.

Now this doesn't mean your pain is meaningless. It's important and it fuckign sucks. But I am saying what u are feeling is reasonable and there is nothing wrong with ur feelings.

9

nihilistique wrote (edited )

Reply to by !deleted48437

Idk what made people dislike this post specifically, it is unrelated to other posts you have made.

I understand that feeling, it is just horrible to see anyone or anything hurting or harmed. I mean, I can end up tearing up and on the verge of crying over things a lot of people don't think much of, like people being stressed or tired from "normal life" stuff such as work and other such things.

Personally, I find it helps at least a little to just let out my emotions. As much as it can hurt, I like being able to express things and let myself cry if that is what I need to do in order to get something out of my system. Venting is also good if you know anyone who you have that kind of trust with and you are both okay with it. I mean, even if someone isn't available in the moment to see what you are saying, it can be nice to just express where someone has the potential of seeing so you can feel you got it out to someone.

I'll admit, I don't know if I'm the best person to give advice on dealing with these things, because I don't have a lot of coping mechanisms other than some very basic things I use when I'm not in an environment where letting all my emotions out is a safe thing to do. I can't guarantee this will be the thing that works for you, but I recommend trying to let your emotions out as much as you need when you are in a space to do so, and leaving other coping strategies for times where you aren't in a position to comfortably express your emotions, that way it might not build up too much while you are in those situations where you aren't comfortable expressing how you feel.

1

ukuleleclass OP wrote

i’m lucky enough to live close to a lot of river systems and so i love to just lay out on the rocks and listen to the sounds of moving water, birds, wind rustling in the trees. the smell of forests and the precipitation that builds up in small crevices of moss during the wetter seasons is always a pleasure… sometimes i don’t even mind getting soaked and just stand in the silence of the rain :)

2

MelissaTheRotund wrote

Agreed.

Was thinking of trying to set up a community watch that'd be aimed towards peaceable conflict resolution so people have someone other than the cops to call when something's going down.

This is especially pertinent because the cops are really not trustworthy around here.

I was also considering doing what you've mentioned you did as well, I just need to get supplies to make the box.

The main issue is I live in a somewhat bourgie area (though not anywhere near as bad as comparable areas in the region) and would have to make the box look aesthetically pleasing for people to put up with it.

2

MelissaTheRotund wrote

I appreciate this.

The work-outs in this link seem good for people of any level of fitness provided they have at least near-full range of motion in their limbs.

Some are more advanced or strenuous than others, but they also rank the difficulty levels.

Don't feel discouraged if you're needing to start with just the basic stretching because you've let yourself idle for the past 15 years due to increasing depression at the state of the world: Everyone must start somewhere, and I'm needing to do that myself because I literally worked myself nearly into an early grave last year!

Also, if you fall off your routine, don't beat yourself up over it. Everyone fucks up from time to time. You cannot expect perfection, instead identify why you fell off the routine, and if you can change your routine to prevent that happening again, then do so!

Just remember, if you do not fight, you cannot win! So never give up the fight!

3

MelissaTheRotund wrote

As things are right now, I need my meds to avoid going insane, and of course there's the HRT I take.

The medicine is effectively a bandage and some advil; reduce the impact and visibility of the harm being done so you can get back to grinding yourself to death.

There ARE people (like me) who would be depressed even in a perfect world, but I think changing our society to accommodate people with various neurodiversities is preferable to drugging us to alter our mental state to more closely resemble a neurotypical's on the surface.

3

a_perfect_map OP wrote (edited )

more: https://rune.une.edu.au/web/handle/1959.11/27393

Pretty much the way I see it is, and this is just my opinion, but most people cannot stay worried. Or there is a kind of superficiality to their processing of worrying information. Others who are more troubled by the news connect more dots, they see structural implications, potential trends. I guess what I mean is that most people don't really live like the truth is real. For those that do, stuff like anticipatory trauma is a real existential threat. Because the sky is indeed falling; it is no 'disorder' to be upset by the fact that the human species is like an out of control semi truck barreling downhill with no brakes.

Also, mindfulness was helpful according to this study. I know that mindfulness is basically a dead meme in psychology and psychiatry but there is some truth to it I find. At least, there's no reason not to try it really. The research on it is pretty good.

1

a_perfect_map OP wrote (edited )

I prefer talking about how the world is already terrible than about what some expert told me. I don't need an apocalyptic end times myth to tell someone that factories & cars suck.

Of course. That's true of anything, do your own research.

I suspect people indifferent about climate change have a healthier relationship to death than those panic-stricken about the end of the world.

I find that having to come to terms with my own death because of collapse eventually made me a more compassionate person that tries harder. Not everyone is panic stricken.

IMO capitalism looks like a subconscious death drive manifest on a societal level. The West is built on the denial of death, we keep our elderly away from view, youth and vigor are lusted after and considered strong. This is very different than the East. The West has a fucked up relationship with mortality IMHO. But of course America is not the world so its different everywhere.

2

ziq wrote (edited )

I've always been incredibly socially isolated and covid19 has taken that isolation to the next level.

Good things:

I rly enjoy how no one gets in my personal space now and if they do I can tell them to back off without getting punched.

I love being able to wear protective gloves everywhere without getting weird looks since I've always been a germophobe.

Bad things:

Cops everywhere and way more pissy than usual since they're actually having to work now.

Snitches everywhere.

4

a_perfect_map OP wrote (edited )

Sorry to hear about your struggles, I can identify with parts of that. Glad you grew out of that and hope you are much happier now. Hopefully these things can make us stronger and more compassionate like you said.

It is really dumb how quick we are in the west to medicate young people. Really, I think the "abnormal" thing is how most young people are depressed and troubled now, how is that ok or "normal"?

I like your tree pruning metaphor too; maybe "mental wellness" is an unpruned tree? Huh. I feel that societal pruning can take other forms besides psychiatric pressure as well. Like how people are rushed through school systems, at each point they are told, get ready for what is coming next, over and over. No time to consent. They got us making life choices as teenagers, that is just so fucking stupid. There are plenty of other pressures and they wear on a person, that's why we got to look out for and support one another.

3

Majrelende wrote (edited )

I was forced to take them (or pretend to take them) for a short period when I was young for “anxiety” (mostly severe gender dysphoria), and they were terrible— like having one’s head entirely wrapped in a blanket, I remember saying at the time. For the part that was not dysphoria, I eventually learned not to care about anything that was not important; that is, everything I was taught to care about.

I find the idea that psychoactive drugs are needed to bring someone back to normalcy extremely suspect, as that would imply that there is something inherently wrong with people in the first place or that it is necessary or inevitable that their minds be broken— an undoubtedly arrogant and rightist (as I would say, at least) view.

I was recently reading a few of the books of Masanobu Fukuoka, who mentioned that citrus trees were best left in there natural form, unpruned— “the branches do not tangle, sunlight falls on every leaf, and the tree bears fully each year, not only in alternate years.” However, when the tree’s growth is disturbed by pruning, more pruning can prevent the tree from becoming too sickly. This method was unnatural, so Fukuoka decided that there had to be a natural way to keep trees healthy. He eventually decided upon this path— in some cases, it was possible to encourage the tree back into a natural form. (This was all just as I remember it— please point out if I have any errors.)

Abandoning people who are suffering is like abandoning a pruned tree— they are likely to suffer— so they are given drugs, pruned further into an unnatural shape. (Often, the reason for this initial pruning is because people are not naturally “desirable”— socialisation plays a part in this.) However, this is not solving the problem, but rather, it is moulding people into what is thought they should be, relatively; it is not considered what they would be naturally, if they had not been harmed in the first place.

5