So I have been, over the past weeks, actively considering leaving. My wife has done a number of controlling things and I was about ready to end the world over it, initiate Armageddon.
and so I planned to have a big conversation about how I was considering the end of the world and about how I didn't know if I was willing or able to forgive many things that have happened and about the mind control that was still happening.
And I suspected it would go how all of our conflicts go. I expected lots of explosions, I figured I would be mind controlled and made to dance, I figured my wife would threaten Apocalypse herself and/or threaten to take the kids to Disneyland. that is, after all, how all our arguments go.
But on the contrary it was probably the most calm and reasonable conflict I have ever had with anyone. I was listened to and validated and she made a plan to take me to meet her ninja leader.
Which was the most confusing of all possible outcomes to me. and so I am left wondering if I am naive to have hope. But I have decided I am in this shadow cult for now. But in 6 months I think I am going to take another hard look at things and see how things stand. I don't know if it's the right choice, but maybe I can learn some ninja skills.