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[deleted] wrote

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asterism OP wrote

This is how she has been from the beginning when my heart was 110% in it. This is who she is. This is the way she treats her friends when they hang out with people that arent her. This is not my fault, this is not my problem. I am as loyal as a fucking dog and I fucking hate that about myself I do not deserve this.

Please stop taking my wife's side on everything.

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[deleted] wrote (edited )

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lettuceLeafer wrote

You are going to have to do better than that. You have spent a lot of effort playing defense for abuse. Saying I'm sorry where you both tried to minimize your harm to me by saying how you didn't mean it. Then in your non apology to asterism you literally won't even apologize. You just minimized your harm and covered up what you did under the guise of an apology.

You have genuinely hurt asterisms, and not just that I know there are other people who are being abused on this website who watched you defend abuse. And we don't know how much you hurt them. You could have been the deciding factor between one of them reaching out for support. You made raddle a not safe space for victims of abuse.

I think you should take a break, cool down and think about what you have done. Then write up a real apology to people on the site so they know you won't continue your behavior. I know from when you have called people out before you wouldn't accept this cop out, so I think its fair to hold you to the same standards you have helped make precedent. You have spent much much more time calling out people for less harmful behavior than you have put into your "apology". Honestly this comment counts as doubling down because its purpose is to not hold yourself accountable. Not apologize.

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[deleted] wrote (edited )

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lettuceLeafer wrote

On raddle there is allways a big spectacle where the person who has done harm goes

no I didn't do anything wrong. Everyone is overreacting

Until its this long as thread. A while passes, emotions chill, then a genuine conversation happens. I'm not going to interact with you until everyone has had time to cool off. I say a 24 hours minimum. And I DO NOT look favorably onto you that you tried to message asterism and go against my advice. Honestly I don't take it favorably that you tried to make your accountability process hidden. That has never been the case and you know that. So I'm going to take it in bad faith.

You need to be quiet and reflect for at least 24hrs. Then I'll talk. I ain't going to make a spectacle that hurts everyone that you have done harm so you can have a temper tantrum. Because humans are animals and when we feel slited we aren't reasonable. We need time to cool off.

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Gardon00765 wrote

"You need to be quiet"? Upset they didn't take your advice?

You arent there parent. Its no wonder they left

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lettuceLeafer wrote

Hey, I wanted to check in. While I appreciate your takes on international conflicts an feminism I would like to let you know that asterisms has made several posts about how their wife is unobjectably abusive. So I wanted to make sure you had that context.

I wouldn't want there to be a big raddle drama in meta if it's just a case of you not reading some of asterisms many posts. I'm not mad or anything I just wanted to let you know so there doesn't end up being conflict that was unnecessary.

I honestly was really confused because with context your comments come off as something your wouldn't say. So I wanted to make sure you had full context.

To be clear not calling you out or anything. Just letting you know that you comments might be sending people who get abused a message you don't intend to be sending due to lack of info. Which is ok as people aren't expected to read all the posts on raddle.

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