Wow your mother sounds really cool, I'm jealous!
She was incredible. Often irrational though. A victim of the system that refused to be a mere victim. Drug and alcohol issues as a means to self medicate ptsd, It wasn't always awesome but it was never boring and was always full of love.
I friend last night brought up a story that was typical her. My friend got drunk and walked to my house late one night and passed out laying in my driveway. He had thought I would be there soon. I was staying with my partner that night so wasn't coming home. Cops spotted him and woke him up, threatening to take him to jail. He insisted that he he knew who lived there and was waiting on me. So the cops dragged him up to the door, my mom answered, the cops asked if she knew this person. She said, "yeah but I don't fucking know you! “ Grabbed my friend pulled him in the house and slammed the door on the cops. I came home the next morning to find them drinking coffee and laughing about the whole thing.
ziq wrote (edited )
My dad didn't know what an anarchist is, angrily demanded to know if it had something to do with communism, I said no. So he asked some rando he met on a plane what an anarchist is and the next time I saw him he got red faced and screamed bloody murder at me because of whatever that guy told him.
"You're still a patriot though, right?"
They think I'm a violent extremist. They are not fans.
They're also not wrong.
They're all super conservative or super liberal - ultimate respectability/civility politics hours.
I had my Jacobin subscription sent to my mom's house and she joked I was trying to get her on a list. Considering her rant about Jill Stein, she would skin me alive if she knew I didn't vote for Clinton in 2016. I just smile and nod when she goes on about how brilliant Pelosi's 'sarcastic clapping' was, and try to offer counter points to some things.
Both my friends and my dad called me an anarchist before I started calling myself an anarchist.
hermit_dragon wrote (edited )
It is the wierdest shit cause okay my parents for most of my life have been the shitty white liberals right? Dad was born in 1939 and served during the cold war, and mom is a second wave feminist boomer. Often well meaning but ughhhhhh the un-examined class privilege and intellectual privilege and misogyny and white supremacy. The kind of folks that would be appalled if you told them how racist they are. You know? Who support 'the gays' but thought bisexuality wasn't real. Who 'appreciate' Black and Indigenous culture >_>. Who always thought I 'put myself at risk' by hanging out with homeless folks, outcasts, and weirdos, and warned me not to share what I have with others too freely.
But Ill give them this - they seem to take fascism seriously, and they are the kind of people who try to keep learning and growing, it turns out. I didn't speak to them for years for a lot of reasons, but when the world was more on fire than ever I got back in touch, idk they're old and not going to be around for much longer.
But I wasn't going to play any bullshit games anymore, and have contact on my terms. So I was pretty honest about everything I'm doing now in response to what's happening in the world. They surprised the hell out of me by being encouraging and proud of their leftist, organizing-against-the-government, sharing-everything-I-have-with-community, wants-to-live-communally-on-a-homestead, trans nonbinary child.
They seem to be working really hard to be way more decent, and to learn, and that's hopeful. Orrr they're terrified of dying and behaving themselves cause they don't want me to stop talking to them again XD. Life is bloody strange.
You can tell a good person from their capacity to grow and learn. Your parents sound cool
My mom used to hang around punks at my age and took it fine. I can't fucking tell if my dad's an ancap or a maoist half the time with how he talks when politics come up, but we at least agree that the standing bourgeois oughta be guillotined.
My parents have always been hands off with me and my siblings. They really didn't mind at all when they started to hear about my activism, even though their politics are opposed to mine
My mom is a demsoc, and my dad is a radlib. They don't mind.
Different from different people.
One cousin thought being an anarchist meant I was in a cult. Which is amusing.
People are understanding almost insofar as they are willing to hear me out. But the preexisting family power dynamics make it complicated, as with all things.
"how are you my kid?"
"That makes you just as bad as nazis" paraphrased
This thread gives me hope.
I never really told them so can't answer myself, but I think it wouldn't go too bad. The fact people are overwhelmingly well meaning when you know them makes it obvious that the bad in this world is structural more than anything.
Growing up, I had the typical poor American experience, clouded in sexism, misogyny, racism, homophobia, patriotism. I started talking to my mother about anarchism when I was 15 after reading a book for "young adults" on it by James D Forman. She wasn't very intelligent but always heart first so when I would be opposed to something she would usually respond, "You should feel that way! I raised you to know the fucking difference between right and wrong!“ By time I was 18 we had moved to the city and had 3 different wooden buildings/sheds in the backyard and an extra room in the house. She had moved an elderly housless fellow into the spare room. He helped us turn the sheds into temporary dwellings for other neighborhood houseless folks. In the four years before the city government shut us down she had helped about 4 dozen people get back on their feet while simultaneously them helping us with maintenance on the house and property, food, and contributing to an overall sense of community. It was also at the start of this time that we had learned to dumpster, together. She would have never called herself an anarchist, but I know damn well she was.