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jorgesumle wrote (edited )

How do I know I'll join the "right" instance?

Just join a general instance, or search for a instance from a like-minded community. There is one instance for Esperanto speakers, for example. In the end, it doesn't matter very much, as everything is federated.

What happens if my instance gets taken down?

Usually you receive a announcement that the instance is going down, and you have the opportunity to retrieve your content and import it from other instance you create.

Can my friends join my instance or could they suddenly close registrations for my instance?

You can ask or the read the rules of the instance, or create your own instance with your own rules.